Swazi Traditions #Lobola

I’m still on cloud 9 from my recent engagement to John. We didn’t have ample time to celebrate before I left, so I used every new opportunity I could to learn about foreign marriage traditions. Hey – you never know if a Swazi marriage tradition might just make or break the ceremony?! Good thing for John (and our families I suppose), I won’t be coming home with any Swazi wedding traditions.

All marriage traditions in Swaziland revolve around cows, even today. If you’d like to get married, the man has to offer up anywhere from 8 - 17 cows to the woman’s family, costing an average of 5000 Rand per cow ($500) – that’s called the #lobola (sort of like a dowry). Recently, a Swaziprincess was promised to the Jacob Zuma’s nephew (Prez of ZA) and he had to offer 100 cows to her family in exchange for her hand in marriage. I’m pretty sure I’d have a similar going rate. ;) You can negotiate up or down based on factors like education, beauty, and birth order. The cow discussion goes back and forth for a few weeks giving the in-laws an opportunity to get to know one another. This tradition is still alive and well in ZA and in Zulu cultures in South Africa.

 

When selecting a wife and celebrating the engagement, it is also important to know what the woman is allowed/not allowed to eat. The Swazi’s are very superstitious about this. First of all, the woman is not allowed to cook - that's a man's job (fine by me!). She is not supposed to eat the cow’s foot because it is said it will make her run away. She isn’t allowed to eat the tongue because it is said she’ll be too chatty. She is also not allowed to eat the brain because it will make her too intelligent.

 

 

We had an opportunity to visit a small cultural village in ZA as well where we learned about some of the more native traditions. Click here to see a video of the dancers.

Apparently 4% of the population still lives in huts and villages like the ones depicted here. Each one of the dancers that you see here, had to be born in a village like this one. Here are some fun facts about the couple after the I Do’s. If a man and a woman get married and she can’t have kids, the husband is allowed to sleep with her sister and impregnate her instead but his wife will raise the child. Likewise, if having kids proves to be an issue for the man, he is asked to go away on a long journey. While he is away, the wife is supposed to sleep with his younger brother and get miraculously pregnant.

 

 

 

 

Polygamy is common practice in Swazi culture. As I mentioned, King Swati has 12 wives, but his dad had 82 – all supported by the Swazi government. Whether in their primitive villages or in today’s society, each wife gets her own house and the man has a main house as well. The king and his wives are supported by the local people. We went by a couple of his palaces. Needless to say, after visiting the youth center earlier that day, it makes me sick to think of the wealth being squandered away by the Royalty Swaziland. The royal children are educated in the UK, the wives shop in NYC, and they drive the latest cars to give you a few examples.
 

I asked some of the local people there what they thought about the King and his wives, and there was no “negative” feedback per se, but likely because the education level is so low and the royalty is seen as a tradition at the very core of these people. If I had a few minutes with the King, I think I’d go off on him like I had only ever eaten tongue my whole life. However, as much as the disparities between rich and poor exist, they people seem happy and love their country. They also all seem to be able to find enough money to buy 17 cows for marriage. As a side note - I’d sure like to be invited to one of those lobola ceremonies one day, because the only thing I keep picturing is Will & Kate at the Iowa County Fair.

Something new every day…